We paint the backdrop black– stark, plain and dark. It is what they want. My daughter and I, we are painting the backdrop for the set of an upcoming play. They want the black paint to cover up the previous colored canvas– cover it completely, so that no other color shines through.
That black paint follows me through the week. I have butter fingers– one day I drop a bowl, another day I drop a mug, shattering them to pieces.
But more than that, I carry black splotches on my heart when I don’t want to love, or forgive, or when I say or think something that I shouldn’t. These black spots hinder the light and cast a dark shadow over the days.
Thankfully the light uncovers the dark, wipes away the black, leaves the heart crystal clear. Thankfully, I can start over and these inky spots aren’t what define me. Thankfully there is a way out of the puzzle of the darkness.
Though I dropped a couple of dishes, I held many more up toward the sky, letting the God of the universe fill the cracked vessels to overflowing….
Time moves on and for a few days I tasted sweet fellowship of days gone by, as I spent time with loved ones. Minutes press forward, changing the flow and movement and state of life. I grieve for souls who are still searching for truth and meaning and joy– and what can I do about it? I often feel like I’m doing nothing, dumbstruck, saying the wrong things or nothing at all. I pray God takes my feeble attempts at living and transforms them into something I cannot even imagine.
In the quiet I am caught in the web of life, the past, present and future, relationships, and questions and circumstances weaving a place around me, and all the while looking upward for the answers and the focus.
930. The wonderful experience of being part of a play production with a Christian theater company.
931. Rays of light shining through gold, russet, crimson leaves.
932. Taking my youngest to an apple farm with a big group of others… petting and feeding goats, a corn maze, pumpkins, and topped with hot apple cider… a beautiful fall activity.
933. State-wide cross-country meet for the boys — fun, fun!
934. Homemade curried butternut squash soup– yummy.